Ep #65: A Pep-Talk for When You Need It

Welcome to The Widowed Mom Podcast, episode 65, A Pep-Talk for When You Need It.

Welcome the The Widowed Mom Podcast, the only podcast that offers a proven process to help you work through your grief, to grow, evolve, and create a future you can truly look forward to. Here’s your host, Master Certified Life Coach, grief expert, widow, and mom, Krista St-Germain.

Hey, everybody. Welcome to another episode of the podcast. This one’s going to be a little bit different. I decided that knowing that we all have days where sometimes we just need somebody else to give us a little pep-talk, that I wanted to record this podcast for you so that when you’re having one of those days, you can just come to this episode and you can push play, and hopefully you will feel uplifted when it’s over.

So, before we do that though, I want to share with you a listener review and say thank you, listener. I don’t know what your first name is, but the username that you used is GEPIV and the title of the review is OMG!

And she wrote, “I’m a newly widowed mom, since March 2020. I found this podcast probably in April. I’ve listened to all the podcasts and now I’m listening to them again. The podcasts have helped so much. You hit on every feeling. It’s like OMG, she knows exactly what I’m feeling and thinking. Thank you for this podcast. I truly enjoy listening. Your voice is calming, reassuring, and just plain beautiful. I look forward to every week for the new podcast, so thank you.”

Thank you. I love reading these, you guys. It just helps me understand that you’re connecting and it’s resonating and it’s helpful to you, so thank you for that. And it helps other people find the podcast.

You know what I would really love? Of course, ratings and reviews are always great too, but if this episode helps you, or any episode helps you and you want to share it, just grab a screenshot of it and tag me on social media. You can tag me on Instagram @lifecoachkrista or you can tag me on Facebook at Coaching with Krista, and help me get the word out, would you? That would be amazing.

Okay, so I’m assuming that you’re listening to this because you’re having one of those days. And here’s what I want you to know. This walk is messy and complicated and no matter what kind of day you’re having, you are still in the ring. You still showed up.

Quitting really is an option that many people take and here you are, still going. I know you can handle whatever life throws at you. Seriously. You have already been through more than so many women. I also know the worst thing that can happen is a feeling. And you’ve had your share of feelings. You can handle feelings.

Your potential is unlimited. There’s nothing you can’t do when you get out of your own way. And not only can you bounce back. You can bounce forward. Post-traumatic growth is real and it’s available to all of us, even you.

Your partner does not have to be here for you to love life again. You are more than enough. And the thought, “I’m not enough,” is useless. Tell your brain you’re not listening to that thought anymore. I promise, your best days are not behind you.

It’s so tempting to believe that this could be true. But the only reason it will be true is if you keep thinking it. You do not need the approval of others. All you need is your own approval. What other people think about you is 100% about them. So, let them be wrong about you. They don’t need to approve of you or your choices. But you do.

You are 100% worthy just as you are. You don’t have anything to prove to anyone. If someone doesn’t love you, it has nothing to do with your worth. You are 100% lovable just as you are. Your looks, your weight, your finances, your education, your mistakes, none of it can diminish your value or your lovability.

Have your own back because you’re doing the best job you can. And I mean it. Even if you’re ugly-crying in the shower or you’re yelling at your kids, or doing any other thing that you’ve decided makes you terrible, you’re still doing the best you can with what you know. Please be your own champion. Worry only pretends to be necessary, but it never is. And it’s always optional. You don’t need to be confident. You just need to be brave. And if anyone is brave, it’s you.

There is no such thing as a right or wrong decision. There are only decisions. So, make the best one you can with what you know, but decide already. Don’t be a victim to indecision. Do not allow your brain to get away with the thought, “I don’t know.” It’s a lie and it will steal your dreams.

The human experience is supposed to be messy and full of highs and lows and ups and downs and victory and defeat. If life were supposed to go another way, it would have. But it didn’t, and here you are. Who are you going to be now? You get to choose. The only way to lose in this life is to stop trying.

Never stop trying. Take breaks when you need them, but keep putting one foot in front of the other. Sometimes, it can seem like you’re alone. I promise, you’re not. There are over 11 million widows in the United States alone. And they may not be in your circle, but they are there. Other women have come before you, and if they can do it, you can do it.

Now, raise your chin just a little bit higher, drop your shoulders, open your chest a little bit more, take a deep breath, and repeat after me, “I love you, and you’ve got this.”

Alright, I want you to come back to that, if it’s helpful to you, as many times as you need it. Some of us just sometimes need a little pick-me-up. We need a little champion in our ear. Use this podcast for that, okay.

I really do love you, and you really do have this. Take care and I’ll see you next time. Bye-bye.

If you like what you’ve been hearing on this podcast and want to create a future you can truly get excited about, even after the loss of your spouse, I invite you to join my Mom Goes On coaching program. It’s small group coaching just for widowed moms like you where I’ll help you figure out what’s holding you back and give you the tools and support you need so you can move forward with confidence.

Please don’t settle for a new normal that’s less than what you deserve. Go to coachingwithkrista.com and click Work With Me for details and next steps. I can’t wait to meet you.